New York Life Foundation Release New Survey on Childhood Grief
Those who lose a parent growing up feel an impact that resounds over a lifetime – but usually only receive support from family and friends for a few short months, according to a new survey on bereavement from the New York Life Foundation.
The survey revealed that 57 percent of Millennials and Gen Xers who had lost a parent growing up felt that support tapered off within a mere three months of the loss, with 20 percent saying that support declined after the first week and an additional 21 percent saying after the first month.
At the same time, those who lost a parent growing up attest to the relentless, long-term nature of grief. When asked how long it took before they could be happy again and move forward after the loss, the mean period was over six years, and grievers’ most common response was “I’ve never been okay with my loss” (30%). They identified the top misperception of grief as “Just because you seem okay on the outside means you must be fine on the inside” (50%).
“For many, childhood bereavement is a deeply painful and destabilizing experience that warrants attention and support long after the death,” said Brook Griese, Ph.D., co-founder and CEO of Judi’s House/JAG Institute in Denver, Colorado. “Yet, support from family and friends often falls away after only a few short months. There is not a timeline or formula for grief, so a continuum of effective services and resources needs to be accessible to children and families whenever and however their grief affects their lives.”
But for those looking to help, the survey reveals that even the simplest acts can make a big difference to a bereaved child. Individuals who lost a parent growing up identified the most helpful things family or friends did after their loss as basic gestures like sharing stories about their loved one, remembering important dates like birthdays and death anniversaries, spending holiday time with them, and continuing to ask how they were doing well after the loss...